The holiday season is upon us, a celebration of love and rebirth, but many feel stressed and anxious as the holidays approach. It always amazes me how much we are willing to suffer in the name of love and to keep up appearances. The whole craziness of the season is an excellent example of that.
Follow me to learn how to prioritize holiday season self-care and self-love! True love starts with self-love and self-care, but avoiding unhealthy behavior can be tricky, especially with family. Here are five reminders to help you stay connected to love and avoid toxicity.
“This holiday season, choose connection over perfection. Choose presence over presents. Choose love.”
— Nina Izel
1. Sacrifice Is Not Love
When you go above and beyond for others and exhaust yourself beyond your capacity, you will feel resentful and angry in the end. Is it worth it? The holidays often come with heavy expectations: visiting people you don’t truly want to see, buying gifts you can’t afford, and attending events that drain your energy. Showing up out of pure obligation is not love. It’s sacrifice.
This year, why not do a little bit less but with love and kindness rather than trying to please others and always end up frustrated?
2. Giving Gifts Is Not Love
While giving gifts can be heartfelt and loving, we often want to replace love with some gifts. Doing something heartfelt for others without any expectation is a true form of love that everybody wants to receive.
3. Consumption Is Not Love
The stuff you buy to decorate your house has nothing to do with the love within the family who lives there. Think about what will happen with all the decorations when the holiday season is over.
Spending time together, laughing, talking, playing music, or sharing a meal can be so much more fulfilling than the most beautiful decoration.
Resources for Emotional Wellness and Healing
- Learn to Set, Communicate, and Enforce Boundaries for Empowerment and Healthy Relationships
- Understand Compassion Fatigue and Learn How to Prevent and Manage This Challenge
- Manage Anxious Feelings with These 12 Effective and Actionable Self-Care Strategies
- Read About Healing the Inner Child with Ayahuasca: Nina Izel Shares About This Powerful Journey
- Find Out How Psychedelics Can Help Emotional Healing and Lead You to Profound Spiritual Health
4. Control Is Not Love
Trying to control everybody’s experience creates tension, not connection. True love means accepting that your loved ones might have different preferences, traditions, or ways of experiencing joy.
You can start by considering people’s needs and wishes before you host a celebration. True love starts with self-love and self-care, but avoiding unhealthy behavior can be tricky, especially with family
5. Competition Is Not Love
Holidays are breeding grounds for some unhealthy competition. Who’s more successful? Whose children are achieving more? Who has the most picture-perfect holiday setup?
When love becomes a competition, everybody loses. Genuine connection happens when we simply appreciate each other’s existence—exactly as we are. Instead of competing and criticizing, this time, try complimenting a loved one as a gift of love.
Remember: Love Is a Verb, Not a Perfect Present
This holiday season, choose connection over perfection. Choose presence over presents. Choose love. The gift of your time, presence, attention, and spending quality time together creates lasting connections and good memories.
- Have real conversations
- Play games together
- Share memories
- Cook together
You cannot give from an empty container, so make sure that this holiday season.
- Rest when you need to. Be kind to yourself
- Don’t compare yourself to others
- It’s ok to say NO
A Gift of Love
Personally, I will go to an Ayahuasca ceremony to celebrate Xmas. The spirit of plant medicine is a powerful ally that helps me reconnect to the fountain of love within myself. Celebrating with friends and opening my heart is a beautiful reminder that I am the greatest gift, and this life is my canvas!
Plant Medicine and Unconditional Love
Ayahuasca offers a great opportunity to transform your understanding of love during the holiday season. This sacred plant medicine helps you strip away the layers of societal expectations, family conditioning, and personal wounds that often distort your experience of genuine love. She teaches you about the difference between conditional and unconditional love and helps you to experience love as a state of being, not a performance.
A Holiday Miracle
For me, the story of a Christmas miracle has nothing to do with perfect decorations, expensive gifts, or meeting family expectations. It’s about radical self-acceptance, deep connection, love for yourself and others, and seeing the divine in every moment.
Remember, the greatest gift you can give to yourself this year is holiday season self-care and your authentic, healed self.
If you want to be filled with deep love and gratitude, a sacred ceremony with plant medicine might be something to consider.
Happy holidays!
